BREAKING NEWS
MOMMY MOMENT: HOW TO CONFESS TO YOUR FRIENDS YOU WERE PREGNANT AND HAD A BABY
Are you a new mom struggling to share the news with your friends? You’re not alone! Many mothers-to-be face the daunting task of confessing their pregnancy and parenthood to their closest friends. But fear not, dear readers, for we’ve got some expert advice to help you break the news with ease and confidence.
THE DO’S AND DON’TS OF CONFESSING TO YOUR FRIENDS
DO:
- Choose the right time and place: Consider the timing and setting when confiding in your friends. You might want to wait until you’ve had a chance to process your emotions and have a support system in place.
- Be honest and open: It’s essential to be truthful and transparent with your friends. They deserve to know the truth, and honesty will help you build trust and strengthen your relationships.
- Show them the baby: If possible, bring your little one along for the reveal. This can be a great way to share your joy and introduce your friends to your new addition.
DON’T:
- Wait too long: Putting off the confession can lead to built-up anxiety and stress. It’s better to be open and honest with your friends from the start.
- Be too secretive: Your friends will likely find out eventually, so it’s better to be upfront and honest with them.
- Avoid comparisons: Try not to compare your experience to others or make your friends feel left out. Focus on your own journey and let them support you.
THE ART OF CONFESSING: TIPS AND TRICKS
- Prepare your friends: Consider having a conversation with your friends before introducing them to your baby. This can help them understand your feelings and expectations.
- Be prepared for reactions: Your friends may be shocked, surprised, or overwhelmed. Be patient and understanding, and remember that their reactions are a reflection of their own experiences and emotions.
- Focus on your journey: Instead of dwelling on the unexpected, focus on your journey as a new mom. Share your experiences, struggles, and triumphs with your friends, and let them support you every step of the way.
FAQs: CONFESSING TO YOUR FRIENDS AS A NEW MOM
Q: How do I know when to tell my friends about my pregnancy?
A: Trust your instincts and wait until you’re comfortable sharing the news. You might want to consider talking to your partner or a close family member first.
Q: What if my friends are shocked or surprised by the news?
A: Be patient and understanding. Remember that their reactions are a reflection of their own experiences and emotions. Take the time to process their reactions and address any concerns or questions they may have.
Q: How do I introduce my baby to my friends?
A: Bring your little one along for the reveal, and be prepared for lots of snuggles and oohs and aahs! Make sure to have plenty of photos and updates ready to share.
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I got pregnant in November of last year and just had my baby a week ago. I had severe prenatal depression my entire pregnancy and didn’t see any of my friends in person, which was easy since I moved from a big city to a small town a few years ago and most of my friends are still in the city. I even reduced or cut contact with some people completely because my emotional and mental state were totally turned upside down and I couldn’t handle the thought of admitting to anyone out loud that I was pregnant. Each friend checked in through text every once in a while and I always kept it brief and aloof, not wanting to share any personal news.
Now that I’ve had my baby I feel like a totally different person and I can’t believe I went so far as to keep this a huge secret from nearly everyone in my life. And I want to let people know what has happened but I’m not sure how to go about doing it. A text seems too casual, but I’m not ready to start calling people on the phone. I had a thought of sending an email with the baby announcement, saying something like “If you’re getting this email it’s because we are friends and I wanted you to know…” or maybe I should send each person a personal email?
Actually just typing that out made me realize I have no idea what to say or how to say it. How do I confess that I kept this huge thing a secret from so many people who I would like to stay friends with?
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Calling is honestly probably easier than any other option! It’s fast, it’s personal, and you won’t get bogged down in trying to come up with the perfect words. You can just say what you said here. You weren’t in a good place, now you are, and you’re letting people know they’re still important to you and that you’d like them in your life and your kid’s life if they want to be.
*”…and I wanted you to know that I care about you and value our friendship.*
*Unfortunately, I’ve spent most of the last year in a severe depression that made it difficult for me to reach out or to tell you how special you are to me. I’m doing better now, slowly easing back into who I am when I’m not feeling miserable, so I didn’t want to wait another day without connecting.*
*There have been a lot of changes in my life recently, including the arrival of my son/daughter Baby So-and-so. I wish I could have shared my pregnancy with you sooner, but my mental health made it difficult enough just to function.*
*I’m planning to reach out to you individually over the coming weeks, but please bear with me; between the depression lifting and the difficulty of the newborn phase, I’m still struggling a little bit. I appreciate everyone who reached out to me over the last few months – even when I couldn’t connect the way I wanted to, your messages and kind words meant so much to me.*
*Thank you and I love you and I can’t wait to catch up.”*
And then actually follow up. Even just one person a day, even just a text. The general email to a bunch of people is a little impersonal, but it will help give people a heads up that you’re still alive, and will prevent you from having to explain why you disappeared over and over again. The follow up message will remind them that you care about them and value their individual friendships.
I’m sorry you had such a difficult time during pregnancy. I’ve had to send the “post-depressive episode” messages more time than I can count, and it sucks, but your friends care about you and will understand. And you’ll have a beautiful baby to share with them, which never hurts.
One of my friends completely dropped off the grid and stopped responding to everyone’s messages due to a massive mental health crisis that resulted in some time in a mental hospital. He ignored everyone for like a year.
Anyway when he came back and told everyone what happened, people were just happy he’s back
So fun story. My bestie hid her pregnancy for her second kid and texted the group chat at like 7 am the morning after she gave birth.
She has rough pregnancies and had suffered a loss earlier on.
I can’t repeat more. We were not mad. At all.
Good Friends understand. Good Friends love you for you and what you need to do for you.